Minggu, 05 Agustus 2012

I Am a Failure: This Type of Thinking Will Breed Anxiety

I look at my life and all that I see is that I am a failure. I barely graduated high school and I didn't have the balls to finish college so I am a failure. My girlfriend broke up with me and she had a list of things why she was doing it. But basically she was saying that I am a failure. If this is how you have been thinking or feeling then STOP. There is no such thing as being a failure.

What I have come to understand is that when a certain something or a certain event doesn't workout the way I planned, it doesn't mean that I failed. What it means is that I have found a way in which it will not work. This is valuable information.

You see the problem was that I was constantly thinking of the situation as a failure. So the more I thought of myself as a failure, the more failing I got. The universe was giving me more of what I asked for. This type of negative thinking was breeding anxiety. And the more I started having these types of thoughts, the more I was plagued with anxiety problems as well.

So what I did was I stopped looking at my so called "failures" as failures. I started looking at all of them with objective eyes. I asked myself "What have I not learned from this situation" Once I started doing this two amazing things happened.

I started looking at my failures as opportunities for improvement. This helped to prevent me from making the same mistakes over and over again.
My anxiety started to decrease. This was because I was accepting my inadequacies for what they were and just learning from them. I was beginning to understand that failing was a part of my growth.
It was from these failures that I was able to grow. The key was to not fear or ignore these failures, but to recognize them for what they were. I use them as guides now. They are like sign posts directing me to the life I desire. For instance if my new girlfriend was to breaks up with me, I wouldn't look at myself as a failure. I would examine why our relationship failed, learn from those mistakes, and implement what I have learned into my daily life. When I approach it this way I know I will acquire the woman of my dreams.

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